Interview With Renowned Sex Author Betty Dodson

This interview is one in a series of expert interviews on the blog. We add new interviews on a regular basis. Click here for the complete list of insightful interviews.

1. What advice would you give to “fakers” (orgasm fakers, that is) who are in long-term relationships? One client never mentioned her past fakes. She simply told her husband that since she began to use a vibrator, her orgasms had gotten much better. He was happy to accept the vibrator into their sex life.

Another client had been faking orgasms that were much louder and dramatic than the real ones she’d recently discovered, so she confessed. Her partner was a smart man who didn’t care as long as she was having real ones now.

2. How can couples who have regular, but not outstanding sex, begin to swing the pendulum into more gratifying relations?

If I had the answer to that one, I’d be a billionaire by now. I’d say “not outstanding sex” is better than no sex at all. Be grateful! Another approach would be to have sex outside your relationship. Most often you’ll end up better appreciating what you have at home.

3. How can someone who views themselves with a “blah” body image begin to shift their focus to their sexuality and somewhat disengage themselves from feelings of worry and physical inadequacy?

Begin to do more physical activities and improve your eating habits. Feeling healthy is more valuable than chasing after a perfected body image. Also continue to have orgasms with yourself to keep your sexual energy moving.

4. You speak very highly of clitoral stimulation. What are some of the best ways couples can stimulate this area together during foreplay and intercourse, where both partners get maximum pleasure from the experience?

Glad you asked. Just so happened my website has clips that can be downloaded that show different women using many different techniques for clitoral stimulation. Also my book Orgasms for Two shows couples having sex while a woman uses her vibrator. Basically the idea is how a woman masturbates is what she wants to incorporate into sex with her partner.

5. With masturbation being a key factor in discovering how your body works and what it likes, how can couples begin to get over the stigma attached to mutual masturbation and enjoy this experience together? And is this even a tactic that would be beneficial to the couples’ relationship, or is self-pleasure best meant for a one-person party?

Sharing masturbation is a very healing activity because it demonstrates the ultimate trust and sharing sexual honesty. It’s also a good way to learn about our partners preferred form of genital stimulation and better manual skills brings couples closer together.

About Betty Dodson

Betty Dodson, artist, author, and PhD sexologist has been one of the principal voices for women’s sexual pleasure and health for over three decades. Dodson had the first one-woman show of erotic art in ’68 in nyc followed by three others. She produced and presented the first feminist slide show of vulvas at the 1973 Her first book, Liberating Masturbation: A Meditation on Selflove (’74) became a feminist classic. Sex for One (’87) sold over a million copies. She has authored numerous articles on the subject of women’s sexual pleasure and orgasm. She has been interviewed on prime time cable television shows from the ‘70s to present including The History Channel; The O’Reilly Factor; The View; BET; HBO; Donahue; Sally Jesse Raphael; Geraldo; Joan Rivers; etc.

Read more expert interviews:
Dr. Corey Allan, Marriage Expert
Dr. MP Wylie, Relationship Advisor
Dean Osborne, Human Nature of Cheating

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