Highlights
- Erectile dysfunction comes in different levels of severity.
- If you have mild ED, you may still be able to have intercourse.
- The key to hot sex with ED is finding the best sex positions and angles.
- If your erections aren’t reliable enough, ED treatments will do the trick.
Things start off well: You get excited, erect, but after a (too) short while, the hardness is gone. You feel like you’re failing your partner. Men who come to me for sexual counseling complain about the quality of their erections. I always refer them to the doctor first. Difficulty in maintaining an erection firm enough for successful intercourse could be a sign of mild erectile dysfunction (ED).
What most men don’t realize is that it is possible to have intercourse even with a half-erect penis. All you have to do is find the best sex positions and angles.
Note that these sexual positions will work for “penis in vagina” sex. Anal penetration might be impossible if your erection wanes. A simple trick is to use a penis ring to maintain the necessary firmness. A word of warning: Don’t keep the ring on for too long. (Twenty minutes at a time is safe.)
Here are top 5 positions that can work with a less-than-impressive erection.
1. The Reverse Cowgirl
In this position, your partner straddles you with her front facing your legs. She can sit straight or bend forward. The latter variation may give you an especially nice sensation, with your penis pointing down. Bonus: The unusual angle may lead to some indirect prostate stimulation.
Your lover can help you stay inside by holding the shaft of your penis or squeezing it at the base to keep the blood in. This position is equally satisfying for a woman as it facilitates G-zone stimulation and can get her to orgasm.
2. The Morning Spoon
For lots of men, their morning erections are the strongest and most reliable ones. It’s worth getting up earlier on a weekday to have some fun together. Or you can use those lazy weekend mornings to get intimate.
The spooning position (where the male partner lies behind the woman and enters her from behind) offers not-too-deep penetration, so you may be able to go on even if you are no longer rock-hard.
Another perk of this position is that you two can move your bodies easily to find the right angle and keep the penis inside a bit longer. Experiment with your partner bending more forward or pressing your legs tightly together for an intimate and pleasurable experience.
3. The Cross
Some sexologists recommend that men with ED find more relaxed positions. The idea behind this is to help the body direct and keep the blood flow in the genital area while the big muscle groups are resting.
In the cross position, the man lies on his side and the woman at about a 90-degree angle. There is a bit of movement needed to find the right alignment and achieve penetration, but once it happens, she can lie with her legs behind your back and you can enjoy a slow sex session. Again, if some manual help is needed to keep you erect, she can easily reach for your penis and give it some extra love.
4. The Downward Doggy
Doggy style position is a favorite among lovers who like to go deep. When a woman moves from all fours and rests her shoulders on the bed, she achieves a more arched position. Penetration will be shallower, and you will be in control of your penis. You can squeeze the base or stimulate it to regain a full erection.
You can also enjoy very shallow intercourse, barely entering and leaving her. This way your most sensitive parts of the penis — the glans and the frenulum — will receive extra sensation.
5. Yab-Yum
Here’s something for your body and mind. This ancient position, inspired by tantra, helps build intimacy and enjoyment of sex with weaker erections.
To achieve this alignment, the man sits cross-legged and the woman straddles him, her legs wrapped around his hips. It may be helpful to use special meditation pillows or blankets to get comfortable.
The woman is active here, moving up and down. Since you are in such a tight embrace, even with a weak erection you should be able to last longer. If you lose your hardness, you may grab your penis in your hand and glide it over her labia or clitoris for mutual pleasure.
Help for More Reliable Erections
Even with a mild case of ED, different sexual positions may not be enough to keep you going. You can still enjoy hot sex and have lots of fun in bed, but you may need a little extra help.
Medications such as Viagra, Cialis, vardenafil (Levitra), Staxyn, Stendra, and their generic equivalents, are safe and effective for most men. Not only do they help you achieve an erection, but they can also allow you to last longer in bed.
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Anka Grzywacz is a sexologist, reproductive health expert and Certified Sex Coach™. In her online practice she helps busy women and couples solve their intimate problems.
