Spring is here and love is in the air. Relationships seem to be blossoming all around, but with any relationship there eventually come periods of frustration, arguing, and stress. There are many ways we try to cope when we experience the feelings that accompany an upset in a relationship. The stress associated with a big fight between you and your partner can make concentration at work difficult, interfere with sleep, and cause problems in other relationships in your life such as those with family and friends.
However, there is an even more detrimental aspect of continuing a stressful relationship. Recent studies have shown that a persistently stressful relationship can cause health problems such as chronic headaches, high blood pressure, suppressed immune system, increased risk of heart attack and stroke, infertility, and speeding up of the aging process. Long-term stress can even rewire the brain, leaving you more vulnerable to anxiety and depression. Chronic relationship stress will statistically shorten the life span of someone who is constantly upset in a relationship.
So how much stress is normal in a relationship? The amount of stress that can be handled varies greatly from person to person. Some people can handle the stress, let it pass on by, and continue through life without ever really feeling overly affected. In contrast, some people fall apart at the slightest sign of stress. Your quality of life, general outlook, emotional intelligence, and genetics all play a role in how much stress you can handle.
Stress isn’t always a bad thing. Sometimes it can be the motivation to change a behavior, or to
acknowledge an aspect of the relationship that needs some extra work. However, if you are always under stress and feel like you are in panic mode, then you are probably going to pay a huge price both mentally and physically.
Stress is a way for your body to handle emergencies. Short term it can increase focus and response time, but the longer and more often you are stressed the easier your stress switch can be flipped on.
It’s not always possible to control the stress that a relationship causes, but it is possible to control how you react to problems when they arise. You have to take charge of your thought, emotions, and environment. Try to take change the stressful environment when you can, change your reaction when you can’t, and take time to relax and calm down before making any decisions or taking action.
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