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1. Can you please explain the concept of “The Wheel of Life”?
The Wheel of Life is a shorthand way of looking at life balance. I use the wheel of life to let people quickly see where their needs are. It is an easy visual of where their lives have a flat tire look vs. where it rolls easily.
If you picture the wheel as a car or bicycle tire, it’s easy to see where it needs more rounding or filling in order to have a smooth life ride. For example, let’s say your work area is very full and your leisure area is low. That may be where you need to concentrate more in order to achieve a balanced life. Much of life coaching focuses on life balance, just like the wheel of life exercise.
2. What are some key factors to being a good leader? Does one have to be proficient in all areas, or are some traits worth having more than others?
Needs, Wants and Requirements – Being a good leader requires that you know what your own needs, wants and requirements are for the work that you are doing. This also means understanding your own life values. Or in other words, what is important to you.
Values – Leaders must understand their own motivation and real life big goals. All of this is based on values. Values are quite different in everyone although we might assume they are similar. For example, let’s say one of your life values is honesty. If you are in a business and leadership position in a place where honesty is not valued, you will not be able to be an effective leader. So one of the basic needs for you as the leader would be to work in a setting where honesty is valued.
The most important aspect of successful leadership is to find a job and a setting where your values are in line with the organization’s values.
Leadership GPS – The next important leadership quality is having a vision of what you as the leader want to achieve. Without a vision and a plan of how to achieve that vision is like exploring without a GPS or a map. Likely the exploration will be difficult and may never reach its goal.
Must haves: Trust and Respect – The third essential for good leadership is gaining the trust and respect of the people who are assigned to the leader. Some call this belief in the leader. This is accomplished by sharing needed information with the people who report to the leader and being honest with them even when the message is a tough one.
There are many aspects to leadership that I work with and would welcome a longer format to explore but these are the basic essentials for a start.
3. You specialize in coaching people to “play a game that matters.” Can you explain what that means and why it’s so important?
A Game that Matters is a Game worth Playing for Me – This is again about values. If I believe that my work is important and in line with my personal values then I can make my work have greater impact and I will dare to put more of myself into it.
A Big Game Means Taking Risks to Seize New Opportunities – Playing a bigger game involves risk and opportunity at the same time. It means taking an entrepreneurial approach to the work versus simply doing the minimum required to get the job done. It also means daring to dream and to picture a much larger and more daring goal than the little safe ones that we are used to picturing. In sports this is used as a way to have the athletes seeing themselves playing a more successful game by picturing themselves overcoming greater obstacles.
4. What are your best strategies for winning “the game”?
Winning Strategies:
- understanding yourself in terms of needs wants and requirements, just like leadership, understanding the values you have which actually drive everything you do.
- being willing to take risks to achieve success like you’ve only dreamed of before but never dared make real.
5. What is the best way for someone to discover their true talent and then grow and utilize it?
I have had many clients ask that question and there is no single answer. There are many paths to finding true talent.
Discovering Our True Talents = Being Open to Life’s New Experiences
I believe opening ourselves up to new experiences and being open to life will often tell us where we find joy and likely a talent for the activity that brings the joy. There is a concept called Flow that has been coined to describe a sense of feeling lost and happy in an activity. This may be the beginning of learning about our true talent, when we get so wrapped up in an activity that time seems to disappear. Now we can’t all make a living doing our “happy thing” but we can certainly round out our Wheel of Life and make our lives more fulfilling by engaging more in our flow activities.
To grow that special talent is like growing a garden. It needs space, time, light, nourishment and your dedication to allow it to grow. For example, if you find you are great at finding the best bargains and love doing that, see how you can incorporate that into your present work life by advising on cost saving methods. You can also make it a hobby and advise others on how to do it and make money or derive pleasure from that activity. Both are great ways to grow your talent and have it pay.
About JUDITH GABOR, PhD CRC: GaborStrategyGroup.com
I’m known as a resilience expert and a professional relationship coach. I am the principal and founder of the Gabor Strategy Group. I am also a founding member of the International Association of Coaches IAC, a member of the International Coaching Federation ICF, the regulating body of the coaching profession, and am affiliated with Know-Inc. And somehow I found time to judge coaching research for international ICF conferences.
I founded Separation Support Service, the first comprehensive one-stop crisis management social service for families experiencing matrimonial difficulties. The service became a division of the Family Service Association of Metro Toronto. This crisis management model consisted of volunteer-led support groups, legal advisors and social and psychological support referrals. This model has been adopted throughout North America as a basis for service delivery to families in crisis. I was a guest on television and radio shows and featured in news articles over 100 times during my tenure with this vital service.
Since completing my doctorate at the end of 2000 at the University of Toronto, I have become an internationally recognized coach and speaker; I love to talk in-depth about the characteristics of resilient people and the secrets of good leadership through excellent interpersonal relationships. My doctoral research into the characteristics of leaders, managers and entrepreneurs who survive, thrive and win their game in the midst of workplace change is the basis of my upcoming book.
I am a qualified teacher of children and adults; I hold a BA in history from York University, a Masters of Education in Curriculum, Teaching and Learning from The University of Toronto and a PhD in Education with an adult education and leadership curriculum focus from the University of Toronto. I received my professional coach training from Coachville and then specialized in executive and leadership coaching at the Coach Training Alliance in Colorado. I am also certified as a Relationship Coach by the Relationship Coaching Institute of California. I know about worklife balance – I’m a professional with a busy personal life as a wife, mom and stepmom of 5, volunteer, avid swimmer and photographer.
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