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And How They Keep It A Secret
In September’s issue of Men’s Best Living magazine, a poll found that most guys have a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy when it comes to sharing their loss of erection sexual dysfunction woes with their partner(s). And their reasons aren’t quite what you would expect.
Yes, there’s a degree of embarrassment and shame over needing an ED treatment and having to buy Viagra online to keep it secret. But more than that, many men simply don’t want a warm and fuzzy confession session with their wife or girlfriend with all that mushy, nurturing acceptance. Screw that, they say.
These men told the magazine they liked their female partners to think they were “virile beyond their years.” In other words, it was a turn-on for these women to go to bed with a super-stud with a touch of gray at the temples. If prescription Viagra can put some steam in the Little Engine That Could, where’s the harm in that? they asked.
So, how did these men get away with it? What are the tricks of the trade when trying to disguise erection problems?
Here’s what they said about how to keep your Viagra habit a secret from your significant other:
Hide Your Viagra Stash. This seems a little obvious, but it’s surprising how many males walk right over to the medicine cabinet after getting their Viagra delivery. (If these guys were in a monster movie, they’d be the first to fall prey to the alien, shark, zombie, or biker vampire.) Wake up, Studly! If you know she never looks in the second tray of your toolbox, put it there. If she’s not interested in your snapshots from the Houston “Dress Your Horse as a Bond Villain” Derby, put your prescription in with those. Just make sure it’s convenient enough to reach fast when you need it.
The Stalling Game. It takes 15 to 30 minutes for a wonder drug like Cialis, Viagra or Levitra to kick in so you can use The Force. If your lady begins to feel amorous and you either haven’t taken your prescription pill yet or are waiting for it to kick in, now’s the time to get creative. This can be a good thing – think of how often women complain of men’s passion dying too quickly. Well, now’s your chance to get her all hot and bothered and draw out the “suspense.” If you need to go get your Viagra from the toolbox, make an excuse that you’ll get some wine, fetch a sex toy, dim the lights, whatever. You look attentive. You appear considerate. You do not look desperate.
Okay, that’s chewed up at most two minutes. Now what? Well, this is why foreplay is the greatest delayed-fuse for an explosive device ever invented. Again, the wonderful thing is that tender courtesy and attentiveness work in with your own agenda. Don’t let your lady see or feel the absence of happy bulge in your trousers until your prescription kicks in, and you’ll actually start making her want you more. Caress and hold her from behind if that works. Going down on her is a great stall tactic. If you’ve been experimenting with kinky games such as blindfolds or dominance and submission, now is the time to use them.
Keep the Mystery Alive. You’re in bed afterwards, and she’d like to talk. That does not mean open the floodgates of your mouth in a moment of emotional intimacy that goes like this: “Well, uh… ha, ha, you know how I got it up that second time? That uh, that wasn’t really me…” In other words, how you’ve had a little help from online Viagra. Women do like honesty. About finances. About where you parked the car. About when you’re coming home.
They do not want nor do they need honesty about what Makes Sammy Stand Up Straight. Think of all the great leading studs in the movies. They’re all mysterious strangers on screen aren’t they? Women don’t want to know too much about their heroes. If they learn a little more, they might be disappointed. So be her hero. Be a little mysterious.
Suppose She Finds Out? First, don’t panic. And don’t be embarrassed. This is your time, even with your receding hairline and your potbelly, to play Coolest Man Alive. Go back to the movie star analogy. The most suave, cool movie stars were awkward geeks who decided if they acted cool, sooner or later they’d be cool. And they’re always cool in a crisis. Just because she’s found out your little secret doesn’t mean you didn’t do all that heavy lifting in the bedroom.
So if she finds out, turn the revelation of your treatment around and make it into a “strong” thing…something you did for her. You don’t complain. You don’t feel sorry yourself. You’re Action Man. You decisively reached for the computer keyboard. You even typed in a masculine way, damn it. And you coolly made an online order for Viagra or Cialis or Levitra. Because you’re a guy who can handle the burden and will not let his woman down.
The “Bottom” Line
Simply tell her the two of you never need to talk about it again, and that she should march her cute little behind into the bedroom because in fifteen minutes you’re going to take her around the world. She’ll respect you all the more because you haven’t made a big deal out of it. (And if you’re smart, you’ll keep using all your attentive foreplay tricks to keep the romance and the illusion alive.)
That way, the next time she passes the supermarket checkout counter, she won’t automatically reach for that women’s magazine. Instead, she’ll remember the hot session you two had and decide to reward you with an issue of GQ. Or the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition. Or Playboy. But just for the articles.
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