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A large part of aging is about perception, though, and as our perceptions about growing older are changing. We are living longer, living healthier, and enjoying the activities of our youth for far longer. This includes our sexual relationships. However, there are still factors that can affect the quality of your sex life as you age that go beyond merely a decrease in hormones.
Is This Normal?
For men and women entering middle-age, some of the normal changes that occur in the body during this time can have a startling effect on the ability to have and enjoy sex. If you experience any of the following issues, a trip to the doctor is definitely warranted to deal with them before your sex life is completely shut down.
Most men will experience impotence at some point in their lives. Also known as erectile dysfunction, the inability to achieve or maintain an erection is something that plagues even young men on occasion. A variety of factors may come into play when you’re talking about erectile dysfunction. This physical response may be caused by physical problems, such as a decrease in testosterone, or psychological problems, such as stress.
For women, aging brings with it the beginning stages of menopause. Known as perimenopause, this period of time may last for years as the body prepares to put it reproductive abilities into a shutdown mode. As hormones such as estrogen decrease, the physical changes to the body can make it challenging and to have sex. The lining of a woman’s vagina will often thin and become more narrow, making it uncomfortable to have sex. Add to this the decrease in vaginal lubrication, another by-product of decreased estrogen, and you have the makings of a very painful, and disappointing, situation.
For men and women, these natural body changes may be easily handled. Hormone replacement, as well as lubrication and even ED medications such as Viagra or Cialis, can be added to you daily routine with your doctor’s approval.
While you may not be acutely sick as you age, a combination of natural aging and environmental factors can take their toll on the body, resulting in conditions and illness that can put a damper on your active life in many ways. Your sex life isn’t immune, so getting to know your illness and finding ways to cope with the effects it has on you is important.
Arthritis
Arthritis is a painful condition in which inflammation and swelling in the joints cause pain and stiffness. Being active in any way can be tough if you suffer from arthritis, and this includes maintaining a healthy sex life. While it isn’t easy to enjoy sex when you’re suffering from chronic pain and discomfort, there are certainly ways it can be accomplished. The key is to try to relieve as much of the pain and stiffness as possible before you get into bed. Over-the-counter pain relievers can be of considerable help for most people, decreasing the inflammation and relieving some of the pressure. Taking a warm bath before bed will also help the body to relax, improve the flow of blood and soothing the irritated joints. Experimenting with different sexual positions may also help you to be more comfortable.
Incontinence
Incontinence can be an unfortunate result of aging. As the muscles in the pelvis weaken, the likelihood of small amounts of urine leaking out at the worst possible moments increases dramatically. Both men and women may suffer from this, but women are more prone to it and the extra pressure put on the abdomen during sex makes it far more likely to happen. Something as simple as changing positions when having sex can have a positive effect on incontinence. Special exercises, called Kegels, also help to strengthen the pelvic floor and improve the ability of those muscles to stay tight and control the flow of urine. In more serious cases, your doctor may be able to prescribe medication or even recommend surgery to solve the problem.
Depression and Anxiety
A large part of good sex is in the mind, but if your mind is plagued by anxiety and depression, it can make enjoying sex almost impossible. Depression and anxiety as we age into our middle years is not uncommon and may be caused by a variety of reasons, from chronic pain and disability to dementia or the loss of a loved one. Even the medications you may be taking to solve health problems could be affecting your mental outlook. Talking to your doctor about your mental health, and seeking the treatment needed to relieve your anxiety and depression is the best course.
Diabetes
We all know diabetes has a profound effect on the way we eat, but it may surprise you to know that diabetes affects your sex life as well. For men, the effect diabetes has on the sex life is all about circulation. Diabetes is not an isolated illness but affects all the systems of the body including the circulatory system. Over time, the blood vessels in the body can become damaged, making it harder for blood to flow smoothly and efficiently throughout the body, including the penis. This may result in chronic erectile dysfunction. Treating diabetes through diet, exercise and medication if needed is the best way to solve the circulation problem, but if more help is needed your doctor can prescribe the right medications to improve the blood flow. Many ED drugs, such as Viagra, work precisely in this way. Originally developed as a heart medication, Viagra is a vasodilator, which means it causes the blood vessels to enlarge on the inside, allowing blood to flow freely through.
For women with diabetes, the effects are quite different. The chemical changes that diabetes causes may lead to vaginal yeast infections. Prescriptions anti-fungal treatments can improve the infection while topical creams relieve the itching and irritation that make sex less desirable.

Heart disease is one of the most common conditions affecting people of all ages, and the risk of developing serious cardiovascular problems increases as you age. It can affect your ability to have sex in a variety of ways, from narrowing of the blood vessels and poor circulation to heart attack itself. A history of having a heart attack can also affect the ability to achieve orgasm. Always discuss with your doctor if you have any kind of concern regarding your sex life and heart health.
Aging is often seen as a negative. With so many changes to the body, the ability to maintain normal activities, including a healthy sex life, may seem unlikely. Being aware of your body’s health and needs, and being willing to make changes as needed, will help you to ensure that your sex life remains enjoyable for years to come.
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