Do you know how long it takes to get pregnant? The answer may surprise you. For a healthy couple it may take up to a year of regular intercourse to see that positive test result. It’s not uncommon for men to develop erectile dysfunction when trying for a baby.
Pretty ironic, isn’t it? Finally, you get to make love as often as you want and it’s just not happening. The good news: there are effective treatments for erectile dysfunction.
ED doesn’t mean infertility
In most cases, pre-existing problems with getting an erection have nothing to do with fertility. “You may be producing perfectly good sperm, but having trouble with your erection”, says Dr. Michael Roizen, MD in this online article.
A perfectly fertile man with ED may still have trouble becoming a father. Why? Because without an erection intercourse is not possible.
Performance anxiety is a major ED factor
Men who are trying to get their partner pregnant complain that they feel like sex objects. Their role is reduced to a “sperm donor”. Sex becomes a necessary evil. No wonder the body begins to protest!
What used to be an exciting adventure, turns into a chore. The pressure to be ready and willing all the time, leads to erectile dysfunction. Sexologists call it “performance anxiety”.
The best way to deal with this issue is to speak about your feelings with your partner. She may not realize, how difficult it is for you. The sooner you talk about it, the better.
A Korean study revealed that timed intercourse when trying for a baby led to ED in 42,8% of men and to extramarital sex in almost 11% of cases. If you’re not used to talking about your emotions, seek help from from a couples’ counselor.
You don’t need to have sex every single day
Does your girlfriend or wife live by her fertility tracker? When her mobile app shows the green light, she wants you in bed as soon as possible? This constant readiness can be stressful and cause ED. Time for some fact checking.
Yes, experts such as Toni Wechsler, author of “Taking Charge of Your Fertility”, recommend healthy couples to have daily intercourse during the fertile window. No, it doesn’t mean you have to do it every day.
Sperm can survive in the woman’s body up to five days and wait for the egg to be released. Rest assured, even if you don’t make love every single day, you still have a high chance of conceiving.
Time to focus on pleasure
Sex when trying for a baby is different. Suddenly, it’s all you talk about. Tired or not, when the time is right, you must get busy. At some point you notice that the romance is gone. No need to light the candles or play sensual music. She approaches you in her yoga pants and doesn’t even ask for foreplay. No time to waste on kisses and petting. Ejaculation is all that matters. A classic recipe for ED.
Luckily, there is a cure. Pleasure. For both of you. Sit down together and try to remember what intimacy was like before trying to conceive. What were your rituals, favorite positions? Time to dig up the forgotten sexy lingerie and focus on quality.
Men suffering from ED have one thing in common. They think too much and feel too little. When you worry about performance, you forget to experience pleasure. Use medication to make sure you achieve an erection and focus your energy on how you feel when making love.
There are many effective ED treatments on the market today. Men trying to conceive may find a new type of medication, Daily Cialis, especially useful. It keeps a consistent level of medication in your bloodstream so that you can begin sexual activity immediately. To learn more about this and other types of erectile dysfunction medication, check out this page .
Anka Grzywacz is a sexologist, reproductive health expert and Certified Sex Coach™. In her online practice she helps busy women and couples solve their intimate problems.