{"id":33609,"date":"2022-10-25T12:55:12","date_gmt":"2022-10-25T05:55:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/?p=33609"},"modified":"2026-03-31T04:42:54","modified_gmt":"2026-03-30T21:42:54","slug":"best-sexology-books-different-loving","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/senior-health\/best-sexology-books-different-loving\/","title":{"rendered":"Best Sexology Books: Different Loving"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><b>Highlights:<\/b><b><\/b><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b>\u201cDifferent Loving\u201d is one of the <\/b><b>best sexology books <\/b><b>on BDSM and kink practices.\u00a0<\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b>The book is not meant as a sex guide but as a description of non-standard sexualities.<\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b>If your partner has expressed interest in BDSM, the book will help you understand why people enjoy it.\u00a0<\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b>BDSM offers sexual activities that don&#8217;t include intercourse, which can be a relief if you have erectile dysfunction.\u00a0<\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<hr \/>\n<p>According to the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/publication\/304341962_A_Global_Survey_of_Sexual_Behaviours\">Global Survey of Sexual Behaviors<\/a>, between 8 and 28 percent of people engage in S&amp;M or bondage sexual practices. Many more fantasize about them. The popularity of the \u201c50 Shades of Gray\u201d books and movies showed that sexual power play attracts big audiences.<br \/>\n<b><\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cDifferent Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission\u201d by Gloria J. Brame, William D. Brame, and Jon Jacobs is one of the<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/current-health-news\/best-sexology-books\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">best sexology books<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> on the subject. The authors spoke with over 200 people, from engineers to attorneys, who in their free time like to explore non-standard sexuality.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h3>Why We Love It<\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This book is not meant as a BDSM guide. Its goal is to present the richness of unusual sexualities. The authors warn that some of the activities described can be risky and discourage practicing them.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cOur goal is to explain what people do, why they do it, and what they get out of it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&#8217;s a challenging read but an important one if you\u2019re interested in exploring the idea of BDSM at home with your partner. The book explains what this lifestyle is about \u2014 and flashy sex rooms are not the most important part of it.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/2.jpeg-91_11zon.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-33611\" title=\"S&amp;M toys\" src=\"https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/2.jpeg-91_11zon.jpg\" alt=\"S&amp;M toys\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/2.jpeg-91_11zon.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/2.jpeg-91_11zon-300x200.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<h3>Is This Book For You?<\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cDifferent Loving\u201d is a deep dive into the world of nonstandard sexual desires. It can be a thought-provoking read, especially if you don\u2019t know much about the topic. All erotic practices described are done by consenting adults, but some of them can still trigger you. It\u2019s best to approach this book with a dose of curiosity about our complex \u2014 but very human \u2014 nature.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here\u2019s why you may find it interesting or even enlightening.<\/span><\/p>\n<h4>If You Feel Like a Freak<\/h4>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">People described in \u201cDifferent Loving\u201d engage in sexual activities many of us didn\u2019t even know existed. And yet, these men and women are not freaks or perverts. They care about their partners and make meaningful contributions to society.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you&#8217;ve ever felt like your sexual needs were weird, this book will help you accept yourself and your particular erotic interests. You\u2019ll realize that you\u2019re not alone and find resources to meet like-minded people.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h4>If Your Partner Has Unusual Desires<\/h4>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex therapists\u2019 offices are filled with couples in crisis. Sometimes it\u2019s not cheating or lack of desire but something more creative. Perhaps you discovered that your male partner loves wearing women\u2019s stockings. Or your wife of ten years finally gathered the courage to ask you to give her a good spanking.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you\u2019re used to more standard forms of sexual play (sometimes called vanilla sex), the revelation can be shocking. You may feel angry or even disgusted by your partner\u2019s preferences. Those feelings often come from uncertainty or fear. Learning why people enjoy kinky activities can give you some peace of mind.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Understanding is one thing, and joining your partner is another. You are in no way obliged to engage in sexual activities that make you uncomfortable, but you&#8217;ll have to find ways to communicate with your partner about their sexual needs and yours. Sometimes it\u2019s better to talk to a counselor or sex coach who can help you navigate those conversations.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/3.jpeg-88_11zon.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-33612\" title=\"Woman holding a whip\" src=\"https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/3.jpeg-88_11zon.jpg\" alt=\"Woman holding a whip\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/3.jpeg-88_11zon.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/3.jpeg-88_11zon-300x200.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<h3>What You&#8217;ll Learn<\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cDifferent Loving\u201d is not your typical how-to guide, but it will give you better insight into unusual sexualities. You\u2019ll find some of the information useful, even if you\u2019ve never dreamt of visiting a BDSM dungeon.<\/span><\/p>\n<h4>Play by the Rules<\/h4>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One of the biggest complaints from BDSM practitioners about \u201c50 Shades\u201d films was that they didn\u2019t focus enough on the <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/publication\/332577621_The_Role_of_Consent_in_the_Context_of_BDSM\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">rule of consent<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. People who enjoy erotic power exchanges, bondage, or spanking want to do it without causing excessive harm. Pain is inflicted only if someone says they want it.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There are many books and workshops you can take if you\u2019re planning to experiment with kink. Different communities follow different principles, but there is general agreement that BDSM practices must be \u201csafe, sane, and consensual.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here\u2019s what that means:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Safe. <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Understanding and minimizing the risks of harm or injury and taking care of your partner\u2019s wellbeing.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Sane.<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Play only when both of you have full mental capacity and not under the influence of mind-altering substances.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Consensual. <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Everything you do with another person has been agreed upon, and you are able to stop or pause at any time.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h4>Men Can Be Submissive Too<\/h4>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Contrary to popular belief, there are lots of men who enjoy BDSM practices as submissives, or masochists. Men are raised from a very young age to be tough guys, to take responsibility, and to always hold it together.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Getting into a submissive role helps some men relax and surrender. While there is a sexual element to it, the experience can mean much more to a guy. It can provide a space to just be, to hand over tension and the constant need to be in control.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So, if you\u2019re a man who secretly fantasizes about being tied up, or if your partner has shared such fantasies with you, don\u2019t panic. It\u2019s not as bad as you think!\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h4>Kink Is About Connecting<\/h4>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One thing you should not rely on for kink education is mainstream pornography. According to the book\u2019s authors, popular porn misrepresents the truth about sado-masochism. It dehumanizes people, presenting them as objects of violence or humiliation.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What it doesn\u2019t show is communication, getting to consent, and the aftercare which is a necessary element of any BDSM get-together.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you want to learn more about dominance, submission, bondage, and other types of nonstandard sexual play, there are good educational videos showing the true face of BDSM.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><a href=\"https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/4.jpeg-35_11zon.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-33613\" title=\"Woman putting handcuffs on her partner\" src=\"https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/4.jpeg-35_11zon.jpg\" alt=\"Woman putting handcuffs on her partner\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/4.jpeg-35_11zon.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/4.jpeg-35_11zon-300x200.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/a><\/h2>\n<h3>Finding Sexual Fulfilment Beyond Intercourse<\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">BDSM has one big advantage over vanilla sex: It\u2019s less focused on penetrative intercourse. This makes it an interesting field to explore if you have sexual concerns such as erectile dysfunction. In kink, you play a lot of mental games and find fulfillment and arousal through teasing or by guiding your partner to surrender and release.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Some kink practices, like a special style of rope play called shibari, turn the erotic experience into an art. That doesn\u2019t mean that intercourse is not on the menu once you decide to get kinky. If you and your partner agree to include it in your play, you\u2019re free to do so.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h3>eDrugstore \u2013 Your Online Resource for Sexual Health<\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you\u2019re interested in exploring the world of BDSM but you\u2019re hesitant because of erectile dysfunction, don\u2019t be! ED is easy to fix with modern medications. We carry Viagra, Levitra, Cialis, and more to help men live their best intimate lives. Our U.S. licensed physicians offer free telemedicine consultations and provide prescriptions for free. Browse our <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.edrugstore.com\/erectile-dysfunction\/?__mscta=2392_94010_11487\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">medication guide<\/span><\/a> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">and place your order today! With eDrugstore, shipping is always free.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Highlights: \u201cDifferent Loving\u201d is one of the best sexology books on BDSM and kink practices.\u00a0 The book is not meant as a sex guide but as a description of non-standard sexualities. If your partner has expressed interest in BDSM, the book will help you understand why people enjoy it.\u00a0 BDSM offers sexual activities that don&#8217;t [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":10,"featured_media":33610,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_autoblog_aioseo_focus_keyphrase":"","_autoblog_aioseo_title":"","_autoblog_aioseo_description":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[82],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-33609","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-senior-health"],"acf":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t<!-- All in One SEO Pro 4.9.10 - aioseo.com -->\n\t<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Curious about unusual sex practices, such as BDSM and kink? \u201cDifferent Loving\u201d is one of the best sexology books to help you understand why people enjoy it.\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"robots\" 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